Dear bestfriend, I miss you so much. I miss our friendship, being there for each other, having each other's backs, non stop talking, taking pictures together, netball games, comforting each other, sharing problems and secrets, telling jokes. You are the one who always lend an ear to hear all my stories even though it is bored and annoying, lend your shoulder for me to cry on.
Just because we dont talk anymore, doesnt mean that I've forgotten about you, doesnt mean that I no longer care. Truth is, I still do. I do my best to check up on you, to see how you're doing, to see if you're okay. But everytime I get the urge to talk to you, it suddenly hits me. I really wanna talk to you but I'm afraid that you will not say anything back.
Remember the times when we were always together? When you made me happy? When you comfort and pampered me all the time? When you said 'you cannot cry if Im not there beside you farah please dont cry'. When you said 'anything for my little princess'. Yeah, I miss that a lot, Atasya. It really hurts me, you know. I've been crying hard for that.
I dont think I have ever missed my friend this much before. It like physically hurts me not to talk to my bestfriend. I just want to hug her and tell her every single thing and I dont want to fight to her or her to fight with me over silly things. I really wanna fix everything but it seems like you really dont have the efforts to be friends with me again. But for the sake of our friendship, I will try to lower down my ego.
Im tired of pretending like everything is okay, you pass by me in school, you dont look at me, I pretend I dont see you and walk away but deep inside its killing me. Every time I saw you alone, I cant hold myself and let the tears fall down my cheeks. I just want you back, I want to talk about it with you and cry and sob and hug you until I'm no longer crying. I feel so empty and alone since the day you stopped talking to me.
Im sorry for everything. For what I've done. We are still friends right? I havent lose you right? Dont hesitate to talk to me okay? Because half of the time, I wish that you were talking to me. I always pray to God that things get better and you come back. I do miss my best friend. I miss you, Atasya Iffah.
Love,
Best friend, FNMXO.POSTED BY FNMXO ON Sunday 2 March 2014 @ 20:33
It's officially 2014! Happy happy happy new year peeps! So, my 2013 ended and 2014 started with a good people but some of the good people have gone. I've lose some of my family and friends. I am here to say that you guys (some of my friends) have honestly made my year so much more fun and awesome for me. Especially my baby, RJ! My 17 sluties, Rifah, Atasya, Khai, Ben, Ferra, Hanis, Wello, Jess, Devy, Ariana, Syaf, Allea, Priscella, Yep, Liaw, Rose and Carmen. Also not forgetting my best buddies, Shaira, Ain, Laila and Sara! So blessed to have them in my life but the sad part is one of them have decided to leave me and ignore me. Well, I'm not gonna say who are the 'lucky' person.
Can't deny that I've been through so many ups and downs in 2013. But what past is past right. I have to make peace with my past so that it wont disturb my present because time heals almost everything, just give it time. Although I've lose my one special friend and it really hurts me, but I must keep on going and I'm trynna forget her. Just wishing for her a lot happiness with whoever you are, my dear. Forgetting about whatever happened in 2013, Im just bringing the good memories to 2014.
Twelve months have passed since we last promise ourselves to lose weight, wake up earlier and more. How's that going for you? Yeah, not great for me either. I have a lot of new year's resolutions along with the other resolutions I failed to do so; I want to be a good daughter, I want to study hard for my future and make my parents proud of me, I have to be ready for my upcoming SPM, I want to burn all my fats (hahahaha ok funny?) I just want a flat stomach and thigh gaps thats all, I wanna grow taller, oh please! This time, I'll try my best to accomplish them, all the best I can do, so one day I look back on to it and tell myself that I did something good before my real kind of end comes.
The last thing I wanna say is............ I'm unofficially 16 years old this year! I'm getting old, everyone is getting old. Who is getting young put yo hands up! So thats all for today, bye bye 2013. Thanks for the bad and good memories.
WELCOME 2014!
Love,
FNMXO
POSTED BY FNMXO ON Wednesday 1 January 2014 @ 21:28
When I think of love,
I think of you, mom & dad,
you are the best parents
I could ever had.
When I think of a happy life,
I think of you, mom & dad,
how you have always been cheery.
Whenever I think of something,
its all about you, mom & dad.
You have no idea about
how happy I feel today,
as I see you both together.
I join my hands and pray,
may your happiness never go,
may your love never fade,
may no sorrow touch you,
may no pain come near,
may your marriage last forever,
may Allah always bless you,
may your life be a breeze,
full of happiness and cheer.
I want you both to stay.
never in a million years
I want to hear about a
separation and divorce
from you two.
Today on your anniversary,
I got you both a chocolate cake,
soft, fluffy and gooey.
apart from looking good,
it also taste yummy.
meant specially for your anniversary.
I hope both of you like my treat
and I hope the cake is just as
sweet as the love you two share,
Love,
your little daughter, FNMXO.
POSTED BY FNMXO ON Thursday 21 November 2013 @ 20:40
Since its a school break now, I decided to renew my blog and I've deleted all the old posts. I dont need those shitza posts anymore. My eyes hurt when I try to read it. Hahaha. Well what past is past. And I have no idea anymore hahaha bye this is just a starting and testinggggg.
Well.. I feel like continuing this post bcs I think its too short man. So here I am left all alone. Huh what a lonely night. Just writing, tumblring and listening songs or maybe I should watch some thai movies. How about that? But I havent download new thai movies and I dont even have a list about it. I think Im just gonna sit alone waiting for her to actually wake up and accompany me. I miss her tbh. She has been so busy this lately. Andddddd there you go.... My tummy suddenly feel so hungry damn too lazy to go downstairs and find some food but the weird part is I just eaten.. I ate maggi with egg. I want pizza right now :(
Love,
FNMXOPOSTED BY FNMXO ON Wednesday 20 November 2013 @ 20:47
